When a big hairy spider moves into your kitchen, it may be acceptable to say “But it is not poisonous and besides, it will eat the flies”

And when the spider fails to eat ANY flies and moves around the kitchen, it may be acceptable to say “But it is natural.”

When said spider (did I mention it was ENORMOUS? also BIG and HAIRY) moves into the cupboard where you keep your plates and then DISAPPEARS? The only acceptable course of action is to tape up the cupboard and eat off paper plates for the rest of your life.