For those who do not follow my every word on Twitter: I have news. Not great news either.
After she’d been sick (lethargic and achy and generally blah) for a week, I took the Bigster to our family doctor yesterday.
I have two words for you: Glandular Fever. Or, for those in the US, I have one. Mono. Suspected, at least. She had blood tests done yesterday.
And this is where Fraser’s and my reactions diverge.
Because this was my reaction:
- Glandular Fever!
- Kissing jokes!
- GLANDULAR FEVER!
- HA! KISSING JOKES!
- Who do I need to notify?
- When will we get blood test results? Will they even tell us anything?
- Is she contagious? (NO)
- Need to think about work schedules if she does have it. Can’t just leave her home all the time.
- Ring school to notify that she won’t be back until AT LEAST the end of next week.
- Tweet to notify THE WORLD.
- Ring Fraser to tell him.
- Think of some more kissing jokes. Explain why she is going to have to get used to them EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE VILE AND DISGUSTING AND OMG MUM SO INAPPROPRIATE.
- Look up Glandular Fever on Better Health Channel. It’s fairly benign. Give it to her to read.
- Go to school so she can pick up the textbooks from her locker.
- Go to Kmart so she can buy some books even though she can’t concentrate to read them.
- Go to Safeway and tell her to pick ANYTHING ANYTHING SHE LIKES to eat. She chooses, among other things, chocolate-coated popping candy. I buy it.
- Text work to warn them that I might be around less in the next weeks and certainly next week.
- Get her to ring my mum. Listen to her trying to reassure her grandmother.
And here is Fraser’s:
- Agree to work from home one day next week.
- We shouldn’t talk about anything beyond that because we don’t have final results.
There is a balance there somewhere.