1. When tests are done, the person tested will be given an accurate estimate of what day the results will be available.

2. When results are ready, the medical institution providing said results will call the preferred contact number to pass them on.

3. If that doesn’t work, it would be nice if they called the other contact number too.

4. If it is a Friday and they are going to be closed for the weekend, it would not be inappropriate to consider trying again later. Especially when they have failed at point 2.

5. When a patient then calls on Monday morning at 8:40, they will not have to call back at 10:20 and have a hissy fit before getting results.

In other news, my hissy fit has paid off. I had a phone call less than 15 minutes later. And the results are CLEAR (although still indeterminate).

Which is still beyond awesome.