Category Archives: not your earth logic


Just as in my other blog I have a tag “unfit-to-be-a-mother”, I think I need an “omgIamTotallyTwelve” tag for this blog.




Posted by on June 11, 2008 in grand plans, not your earth logic


*bounce* *twitch* *bounce*

Settlement on the old house is in 44 minutes.

Regular readers of this blog may occasionally feel some empathy with my husband. Especially when I am – well – excited about something.

melissa: how do you feel?
fraser: Fine, why? Do you mean waiting for the mythical money? 🙂
melissa: yes
should I call Stuart about the keys?
fraser: I don’t expect to see any of it today, or probably even tomorrow.
melissa: yeah
fraser: I left the keys in the old house
melissa: even the one that was on my keyring?
fraser: Ah possibly not that one since I didn’t know about it. It is still mine for another 90 minutes, you could drop it off (not that I expect that you have the time)
melissa: hee
I have to show you this doc I have been working on, tonight
it was soooooooooooooooooooooo bad
I think I made two different friends cry at various times during the night
fraser: There’s two door keys, a bunch of window keys, the oven and burglar alarm manual and some spare kitchen cupboard handles in one of the kitchen cupboards
melissa: omg less than an hour
am I booking your ticket as well?
fraser: No, more than an hour. Is booked for 11:30
melissa: 11am
fraser: 11:30 I believe
melissa: 500 bucks says 11am
fraser: 1000 bucks says we don’t see any bucks today
At any time
melissa: we should see it as uncleared funds though
fraser: If you got 11 from Stewart I am in the money
He had the date wrong the first time
melissa: I have 11 from Partricia and Stuart
fraser: Oh yes, Patricia said 11
melissa: then again that could mean 4 😉
fraser: Indeed it could
melissa: omg
hey you know what we WILL see today
is the closure of the old house mortgage
fraser: Should yes
melissa: so that is money
so maybe I should take the thousand bucks
I got paid by [work]. I am tempted to go book my flights RIGHT NOW THIS MORNING
while I get the key cut
then I have 5 days to pay anyway
fraser: Or you could pay your back pay…
melissa: omg I totally could
fraser: and then book your ticket.
melissa: I could BOOK. MY. FLIGHTS.
Do you wnat me to book yours too?
fraser: I presume you know my dates? I don’t
melissa: lol
fraser: Dream on!
melissa: I can work out your dates
the con starts wednesdya 19th
Fraser gmail: Tick, tick, tick…
melissa: you want to go to anywhere before? You were talking disneyland with Anna but now she may not be interested
lol nice message
fraser: Too busy instead…
melissa: well quite
I am trying to work out when you should fly over. You want to get into DFW on Wednesday 19th for setup
So do you want to fly over on Sat 15th and have a few days in LA first? Or somewhere else?
and do you want to fly straight home again on the Monday 24th after the con?
and what name is on your passport
and why are you ignoring me?
<< jumps up and down
You cannot call because Fraser gmail is using chat in Gmail or another chat program other than Google Talk.
fraser: Cos I am working!
melissa: so I should not book your ticket today then
when I book mine
booking my ticket
fraser: Correct
fraser: Just so long as no credit card is involved
Still 33,623.93 owing on the old house
melissa: the 93 cents are a killer



More reasons to love Biggie’s Recorder teacher:

(random chat about sleepwalking)

Me: I talk in my sleep.

Recorder teacher: That could be dangerous.

Me (thinks): OMG I love you!

Fraser maintains that it typically takes 3 questions to establish whether I am awake or not. I’m not so sure, after Sunday (I was napping).

Fraser: Who is this person who is texting you?

Me: Mumble

Fraser: Huh?

Me: Mumble (something), Reeds, Police.

All that I remember is that I was quite angry that he kept asking me about this when I was giving a clear and obvious answer.

Possibly another Agricola hallucination?

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Posted by on April 28, 2008 in games, not your earth logic


Your tax system != my tax system

I do not know what a “stimulus payment” really is.

Nor do I want to.

It is *so much better* in my mind.

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Posted by on April 5, 2008 in not your earth logic



There is something wrong with my nose.

No, I do not mean that its stunning beauty has been marred in any way, shape or form … but something has got into it.

You know when you are eating and someone starts talking about Richard the Third and you giggle and accidentally inhale the crumbs? or does that only happen to me? Well, it feels like that.

Anyway. As of this morning, I seem to have something in my nose. Something annoying, something occasionally painful.

I even went to the doctor to get it checked out, it was annoying me so much, but she couldn’t see anything. Meanwhile, I am blowing my nose and occasionally rubbing my cheek and forehead in the hope that THE HORROR WILL STOP. Also kind of stressing to various people that I do not put things up my nose willingly or for recreational purposes so whatever it is that is in there HAS NO BUSINESS BEING THERE.

Tonight, it seems to have moved from my right nostril/sinus cavity to my left nostril. My latest theory? It’s Alive!

That’s right folks. Just another day or two and something unutterably disgusting (and also slime-covered) will come crawling out of my nose.

OMG, maybe it is Baby Spiders? Hundreds of snot-covered Baby Spiders? They might come pouring out while I am at Games on Saturday. I wonder whether it is safe to put A WHOLE ROW OF CANS OF FLY SPRAY up your nose just in case.

The doctor’s theory was that I am probably getting a cold.

I almost prefer the Baby Spiders.

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Posted by on April 4, 2008 in health, not your earth logic



A friend told me the other day that a mutual friend/acquaintance had passed an interesting comment on me. He described me as “very down to earth and practical”


Gentlemen, take note. “Down to earth and practical” does not rate high on the list of Ways I want to be Thought Of.

One of my great frustrations is the extent to which I am forced to be practical, to make sure that the things that need to be done get done. In fact, I bitterly resent that this leaves little time for whimsy and fun.

I was really quite upset about it, even though I know he didn’t mean it at all unkindly.

Then I reminded myself that being upset doesn’t achieve anything, pulled my head in, and attacked my To-Do list.

An aside. Last week, I created a new tag – not your earth logic. It has since occurred to me that that could potentially be applied to 90% or more of the posts I make here. Ooops.


Posted by on March 19, 2008 in not your earth logic, rant



Conversation today

Me: I am going out for my walk. I will be back in about 40 minutes or so.
Fraser: Can you take that bag of clothes that you looked out to the charity bin?
Me: No.
Fraser: ???
Me: I do not go that way. I go Clockwise. And that would mean I had to carry the bags for about 2 km instead of about 400m. (these distances based on measuring the Google Maps page with my finger. I think my actual words were “a lot further” but I am sure you, dear reader, will forgive me this little bit of poetic licence to make the story more amusing)
F: Well, you could go the other way …
Me: No, that would be Wrong.

I realised later that I did in fact have a great  reason why I had to go Clockwise (and it has nothing to do with the word widdershins). When I go that way, the first two to three sides of the block are mostly residential (and some light industrial) so there is little to no shade. The last side has the shops with big awnings and interesting windows to look in as I start to dawdle and overheat.

Which is an issue when it is already pushing 30 and moving towards a top of 38.

In fact, I finished my walk in 32 minutes today, which is pretty good as I tend to be a dawdler. I attribute it to listening to music instead of a podcast. I caught myself trying to walk in time to the music at one point 🙂


Posted by on March 14, 2008 in not your earth logic